Category: Emotional Well-being

Overcoming Rejection

How do you deal with rejection when you know it hurts and facing its stings alone is even worse? It is emotionally draining and it affects one’s state of mind negatively. It creates fear. It paralyses self-confidence. And it introduces self-doubt. It makes you question your belief and leaves you with sheer terror. Sometimes it attacks with subtlety and at other times, it attacks head-on, with such cold stare that opens deep wounds. It creates such pain in the heart and feelings of shame, failure and deception. These negative emotions created by rejection are not something a Christian can merely shake off or face alone easily. Only God’s healing can truly set free from such snare.

Most of us have been its victim at least once in our lifetime. Right from an early age when that child refused to share his or her toys with us, or that time when that classmate and her friends ganged up to isolate us from their team, to that time when that person refused to acknowledge our presence leaving us with such shame, to that acquaintance who decided to ditch our conversation in exchange for some frivolous activity, and that employer who failed to see our talent or ability and decided to not hire us, to that group of friends who would not allow us in their inner circle, to that man who could not see beyond the physical. The list is endless when it comes to feeling rejected.

Even Jesus Christ the king of Jews was rejected. He also went through this gruesome experience during his lowest moment on earth. One day he was hailed as King of the Jews with praises and shouts of Hosanna, the next day he was rejected and swapped for Jesus the Barabbas, a criminal in the prison. But instead of Jesus to have withdrawn himself from the people, he prayed for them even on the cross of Calvary.

I met a woman who was once refused a hug from somebody else. She said It was as if a dagger went through her. She had extended a gesture of love but she was blatantly refused. It affected her confidence badly and she withdrew herself from the other person but that incidence also challenged her Christian faith. Her Christian responsibility was not to withdraw herself from another human being but to show God’s love even in the face of rejection.

My Christian friend decided to let go of her ego and she approached her offender with more love gesture. It was not easy at first but she understood what the issue was and she was willing to lay down herself for God to shine through her.

The more you try to deal with rejection in your own strength, the more difficult you may find that feeling to overcome. But, when you accept God’s love in your heart and you resolve to speak the word of God over that situation, when you decide to turn to the word of God and you speak it over your life to overcome that feeling of rejection and its stings, then you will receive your healing, inner peace and emotional stability that you need to live life in abundance.

Asking questions or blaming yourself will not bring the desired solution but turning to God’s word for a complete restoration will help you develop a thick skin, overlook certain human behaviour, see beyond the person who rejected you and deal with the spirit behind that behaviour. Henceforth, make a pact to no longer wrap its stings around your chest, it will only cause you more pain. Don’t carry it on your head either, it’ll cloud your judgement and stop you from carrying out your Christian responsibility. Instead, let it go. Deal with it spiritually and allow God to heal you, he heals the broken-hearted.

Make a bold declaration of faith

(1)
Today I rest in the assurance that God accepts me and God loves me unconditionally. No matter what anybody may do to or against me, God is for me and he is never against me. When the world rejects me for Christ’s sake then the Lord accepts me for his name’s sake. His promises are sure and his word never fails. Nothing can separate me from this love of my God. He never leaves me and he never forsakes me. God accepts me unconditionally.
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(2)
God is for me even when the world is against me. Rejection cannot pull me down nor can it drown me out . When I stand I stand with God and the spirit of rejection flees from me.
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(3)
Rejection cannot put on hold God’s will for my life instead it will serve as part of God’s plan to pull me closer to God and fulfil God’s purpose for me. Henceforth, rejection will work together for my good.
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(4)
I declare that the blessings of God is upon my life. When I am rejected for Christ’s sake, then I attract God’s acceptance even more. When people hate me because of my faith in God, they are pushing me closer to God and to fulfil my destiny then I will excel where God places me.
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(5)
I declare that the feelings of rejection, hurts and pains cannot get me down. Instead of feeling rejected and feeling down, I hold on to God’s plan for my life which supersedes any fiery dart of the enemy shot against me. Henceforth I dwell in peace, I spring forth into a good future and I hold on to hope in God above any human behaviour. God’s plan gives life to my soul giving me something to look forward to daily, it gives springs to my steps and it shall be fulfilled in due time.
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(6)
I declare that I embrace God’s acceptance above any human acceptance. When God accepts me, nobody can be against me. When man rejects me for many reasons, God accepts me unconditionally.

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(7)
I declare that God does not need to have any reasons to love and accepts me, He simply accepts me even in my sinful state.
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(8)
I declare that whether people believe in me or not, whether they accept me or reject me, I will still fulfil my assignment on earth. God’s calling upon my life stands sure and he will fulfil his purpose for me,
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(9)
A Psalm of David. The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. …(Psalm 23:1-6 ESV)
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(10)
I declared that I am cared for, I am not abandoned. I am God’s heritage. I am not forsaken. I am chosen. I am precious in God’s hands. God cares for me even when the world rejects me.
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(11)
I am fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalms 139:4).
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(12)
God is with me like a mighty warrior, I will not fear what man can do to me. God strengthens, helps and upholds me with his righteous right hand. I am not afraid of human rejection nor am I worried over its stings.
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SCRIPTURES
(1)
For my father and my mother have forsaken me, but the Lord will take me in (Psalm 27:10 ESV)
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(2)
What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? (Romans 8:31 ESV)
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(3)
And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose (Romans 8:28 ESV)
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(4)
“Blessed are you when people hate you and when they exclude you and revile you and spurn your name as evil, on account of the Son of Man! (Luke 6:22 ESV)
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(5)
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope (Jeremiah 29:11 ESV)
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(6)
Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand (Isaiah 41:10 ESV).
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(7)
“Can a woman forget her nursing child, that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you (Isaiah 49:15 ESV).
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(8)

And coming to his hometown he taught them in their synagogue, so that they were astonished, and said, “Where did this man get this wisdom and these mighty works? Is not this the carpenter’s son? Is not his mother called Mary? And are not his brothers James and Joseph and Simon and Judas? And are not all his sisters with us? Where then did this man get all these things?” And they took offence at him. But Jesus said to them, “A prophet is not without honour except in his hometown and in his own household.” And he did not do many mighty works there, because of their unbelief (Matthew 13:54-58 ESV)
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(9)
A Psalm of David. The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. …(Psalm 23:1-6 ESV)
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(10)
Casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you (1 Peter 5:7 ESV).
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(11)
But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8 NIV)
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(12)
Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” (Hebrews 13:5 ESV)
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(13)
For the Lord will not forsake his people; he will not abandon his heritage; (Psalm 94:14 ESV)
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(14)
As you come to him, a living stone rejected by men but in the sight of God chosen and precious, (1 Peter 2:4 ESV)
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(15)
“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalms 139:4).
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(16)
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16 NIV)
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Overcoming Low-Self Esteem & Regain Your Self Worth

When you wish you were somebody else, you may be suffering from a low esteem. When a man can’t control his anger and he finds himself lashing out at a woman compulsively, this may be a sign of low self-esteem problem. When a woman sleeps around without thinking of its consequences, she may be acting out her low self-esteem. When you find yourself with feelings of inadequacy but instead of admitting your weaknesses you act it out in an unacceptable manner, this may be low self-esteem reaching out in an ugly way.

Low self-esteem often reveals itself in an ugly way. Only trained minds and experienced eyes can detect its symptoms quite quickly. The Bible says that out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. People suffering from low self-esteem do not only speak what is often in their minds, they act it out in ugly ways unbeknown to them sometimes.

I have seen teenagers battling low self-esteem by trying so hard to become who they are not and I have seen adults pretend they can hold it together whilst dying from this low self-esteem plague. Men cover up with control, manipulation and outburst of anger because they feel inadequate yet unable to admit their weaknesses. Women sleep around because they lack a sense of self-worth. Young adults dress up like grown-ups just to feel accepted. Both male and female succumb to peer pressure just to feel some sense of belonging. This is what low self-esteem does to you; it holds its victims captive, clouds your judgement and fills up your heart with lies. Lies such as you are not worth it, it’s your fault that bad things happen to you, you can never amount to something good, you have to do something wrong before somebody can take notice of you and so on.

A friend once shared in a group meeting how she wished she was somebody else. She totally adored a lady whom she thinks has the voice of the angels better than her singing voice. She would go to any length to adjust her voice to sound like this other lady’s voice but it all went terribly wrong and she got frustrated with herself. One day God spoke to her about the issue. God explained to her that there is a reason why she sounds differently from this other lady, the anointing upon her life is different from the anointing upon this other lady’s life. She is called to a different people than this other lady. When she heard this truth directly from God, it set her free for life. She no longer aspired to be somebody else but she began to pursue God’s purpose for her life.

The above symptoms are by no means an extensive list of signs to watch out for if you are suffering from low self-esteem or if you know somebody who may be suffering from this plague. However, the below biblical declarations of faith would be an anchor for anybody looking to overcome low self-esteem and regain their self-worth in Christ Jesus.

Make a Declaration of Faith with Me Today

1.
I declare that the words I speak are spirit and life and through them I regain my self worth in Christ Jesus. I declare that I am a new creation in Christ. The old me has gone, the new me has come.
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2.
I no longer live for myself, I have a new purpose in life; to live for Christ and to know and share His love with others.
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3.
I declare that I overcome low self-esteem through Christ who strengthens my inner being.
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4.
I declare that low self-esteem will not overwhelm me for I put my faith in God who delivers me from its traps. I will no longer yield to its whims and caprices but I yield my body, my will and my intellect to God for his kingdom use. I will hope in God who is faithful to keep me from getting lower than I already am. I will put my trust in God and he will provide a way of escape out of this prison and set me free to regain my self-worth.
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5.
It does not matter what anybody say, God loves me and my soul knows this. God surrounds me with his love and low self-esteem has no room in my being. Hence, I am called a child of God. I am not a subject to low self-esteem. When low self-esteem sees me, it flees from me because I carry God’s love in me and it flows through me to others around me.
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6.
I come to Jesus and there is rest for my soul. Henceforth I no longer carry the heavy burdens of low self-esteem, its yokes are broken over me and I regain my self worth in Christ Jesus.
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7.
I belong to God and greater is God who is in me than low self-esteem that is in the world. I have victory over low self-esteem and I overcome this plague by the words of God, it shall not return to God void without fulfilling its promises in me. This is my declaration.
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8.
I praise you o God for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
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SCRIPTURES
(2 Corinthians 5:17).
For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain (Philippians 1:21 NIV)
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Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus (Philippians 3:13-14 NIV)
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So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in him, 7 rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness (Colossians 2:6-7 NIV)
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No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it (1 Corinthians 10:13 ESV)
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I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well (Psalm 139:14 ESV).
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I can do all things through him who strengthens me (Philippians 4:13 ESV).
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See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. The reason why the world does not know us is that it did not know him (1 John 3:1 ESV).
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Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light (Matthew 11:28-30 ESV).”
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But you belong to God, my dear children. You have already won a victory over those people, because the Spirit who lives in you is greater than the spirit who lives in the world (1 John 4:4 ESV).
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“For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven, And do not return there without watering the earth And making it bear and sprout, And furnishing seed to the sower and bread to the eater; so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it (Isaiah 55:11 NIV).
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The Spirit alone gives eternal life. Human effort accomplishes nothing. And the very words I have spoken to you are spirit and life (John 6:63).
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